Ye Olde Towne CrEYE'r

In the days before your loveable Eye-on-Albuquerque there used to be something called the town crier. This person would broadcast information of concern to the citizenry so that they would know what was going on. Because in the United States of America, an informed citizenry is one of the best defenses against despotism.

Sadly, large newspapers displaced the lil old town crier and he had to find a new job. Then along came the internet, and poof he found a way to do what had been done so well before. Raw and revealing information. Information that scares those that hold office, or desire to hold office. Well we know our readers have grown somewhat numb to all the treachery and corruption unfolding in New Mexico's largest city of Albuquerque.

We also know that there are two large campaigns in full swing here in the Land of the Shrug and in the spirit of our great great great great great great grandfather, we're going to poke a little fun at our current crop of governor and senate candidates....and before their minions start sending their little emails and complaints to Google and Twitter (believe it or not they do!) crying about the little boo-boos their boss is getting courtesy of the Eye, please, for lack of a better expression, suck it up or get off the stage. If you can't handle a little shin kicking then you have no business being in office for anything. Today a quick little overview, then a more detailed look at each candidate over the next week or so...

SUSANA MARTINEZ
Ok we've heard enough about how she's the country's first Hispanic governor. We don't care and frankly please show us something that she can honestly be proud of. In virtually every metric the state is in the toilet and years behind neighboring states in economic progress. The idea of kicking out our best and highest paying tenant, the US Gov't, while not having a replacement in the wings was not too smart. Sadly, thanks to her, we have a new word: "Martinezed" which refers to a scenario where one comes in yelling and screaming but accomplishes nothing.

GARY KING
As the Attorney General for the State of New Mexico, the only thing we remember you doing is shutting down horse slaughter plants. You made a great presentation on APD's gross conduct at the death scene of Mary Han, but in the words of a tough old lady, "Where's the beef?" We all know how corrupt things are but you haven't shown us much Gary. As the chief law enforcement officer in a state that's stocked pond of corruption we are concerned that you'll let things be as they are. We know you're a "King" in your own mind but there's got to be something other than your family's name to convince those on the fence to vote for you. Step up or step aside.

TOM UDALL
This is our state's senior senator. Funny we didn't know that either until we decided to look up who his opponent was running against. That speaks volumes Tom. We know your family is rich in political history but let's look at the field you're playing in, crops are thin and what exists is all but dead. Having a sitting governor that says "thanks but no thanks" to the Feds doesn't help we're sure but for crying out loud DO SOMETHING! Show us you have a pulse at least. We'd love to say "You d'all that?!" but you haven't done much.

 ALLEN WEH
Allen is a full-bird USMA colonel and what baffles us is why a person with nearly twelve rows of medals would want to get in the fray with this crowd. Oh right, we forgot, power. What is the deal with these very wealthy conservatives that make their fortune in contracts with the very government they desire to downsize to virtually nothing? Is this like a self-hate thing or are they really trying to deprive others of the very opportunities they so richly profited from? And really, using images of jihadist murderers to fuel your campaign. That's WAY crazy.

More coming....